Take Heart
Today two sleepy eyed girls woke me up. Today they ate cereal, brushed teeth and got dressed. Today I slipped two little arms into backpack straps and we climbed into the car. Today I looked back (as I do every day) on our way to school and said, "I love you baby." Today I stopped. As her eyes met mine I went there...just for a moment...because it was impossible not to. I thought about what I'm sure all mother's of tiny people (and especially sweet faced little first graders like mine) have thought about over the last couple of days. I thought about what it would have been like to say, "I love you" and watch her hop out of the car and have her never come back. I went there because it seemed appropriate to honor those 20 mothers unimaginable loss with all the empathy and compassion it deserves. I went there and then I quickly left because the thought is too much too bear and that's no place to dwell. But even as I type that I realize there are those that have no choice but to bear the weight and to dwell in that place this morning. My prayer is that you will find peace in the middle of the darkness.
I have never been more grateful that we live in a place that is not our home. We are dwelling in a fallen world, full of evil and tragic things that no one can explain. There will never be a sufficient answer to the question everyone is asking..."Why?" We are surrounded by heartbreak and pain that cannot be stopped but neither can our almighty God. He stands with the broken hearted. He brings comfort and peace into places it shouldn't exist. In this world we may have trouble...
A thief comes to steal, kill and destroy but our God stands with us against a powerful enemy. He came to give us life. I am comforted by knowing that in this battle He fights for us and His weapon is love.
3 comments:
I "went there" too this morning. Just gave Luke an extra big hug and made sure he knew how much I loved him. I have had to go to that moment before when he was sick, but it makes me sick to my stomach that I now worry about him when he is at elementary school. Those are very sweet words Beth- hope you all have a wonderful holiday season
Beautiful, Beth. Thanks for sharing.
I have thought continually about 'our precious little girls' since the horrific events of last Friday. Are they safe? Do they know how much I love them? Do they understand how my heart skips a beat when we hug or they say, "I love you, Nonna."? I remember Emme running up to me for a 'pick me up' saying "Nonna, Nonna, Nonna", from the purity and innocence of a beautiful little girl. Then I am drawn swiftly and certainly to the Father in heaven who loves them exceedingly more than I do, and He reminds me of His love, and that my anxiety over their safety is swallowed up in His love and grace. Thank you, Beth, for your continual sensitivity to their safety and security....you and Nate are wonderful parents....and Carter and Emerson are richly blessed! Thank you for your heartfelt post. I love you! Thank you, God, for your unending love and protection.
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